Stories from a Sage

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What happens when we get what we want

May 28, 20244 min read

There's a lot to be said for knowing what you want. When you embark upon a courageous life of wild truth, you often get stumped at the beginning of what you even want that to look like. Seriously, it took me ages!! And then you figure it out! You have a clear image of what you're working towards, what you're manifesting and calling in.

Eventually, with a bit of luck and determination, this desire comes to fruition in your life.

But there's a little thing that often gets overlooked amidst the celebration of achieving your desires: the unexpected challenges that arise when you finally get what you want. It’s like the old saying, "Be careful what you wish for."

You've been there, right? You’ve been diligently working on manifesting your dreams. You’ve visualised, affirmed, and stayed open to receiving. And then, it happens – you land that dream job, find that perfect partner, find the perfect 'next chapter' home, or achieve that long-awaited goal. Cue the fireworks and confetti!

It's easy to see why not having what you want is hard and challenging, but we often fail to anticipate the entrance of challenges that hitch a ride with the arrival of our desires.

In my experience, there's a bunch of reasons this happens and it's important to be aware of them when pursuing your vision and goals.

One reason is simply that we often idealise the outcome without fully considering the journey. We focus so intently on the destination that we overlook the bumps, detours, and roadblocks along the way. You get a ticket to the Emerald City but don't realise that the path along the yellow brick road must still be taken. And, I hate to say it but, growth often feels like torture. It’s messy, unpredictable, and usually downright uncomfortable.

I've had this when I called in the healthy partnership with my Queen. Finding her was just the beginning; I still had to take the path of growth that led to the creation of a relationship I feel honoured to be in.

One that I've come across recently is the process of battling with your gremlins. Often based in fear, these little voices pop up to make you question if you've done the right thing, if you should have waited for something else, if this decision is going to lead you onto a path of destruction, or perhaps a little "who are you to do/have this?" comes to play.

When I was looking for a place to setup in-person counselling sessions, I stumbled upon the perfect place. I went to check it out, had a good feeling, and agreed to rent the room. Over the next few days, a bunch of fear gremlins came out to party with whispers of "have I chosen the wrong spot?" "is there even any spiritual people living near there?" "what if it doesn't work?".

Even though my intuition told me I'd be seeing clients in person here. Even though I had divinely stumbled upon this place. Even though I initially had a good feeling - and others around me did, too. The gremlins brought a bunch of self-doubt.

You may also find that there's a feeling of disappointment or unfulfillment. When we attach our sense of happiness to external circumstances, it can be a bitter pill to swallow to realise those things don’t actually change how we feel on the inside. Maybe achieving your desires comes with certain expectations – from others and yourself. Or there’s new requirements to maintain this achievement and finding a new level of balance or harmony brings its own challenges. And, of course, a big culprit in our struggle with getting what we want is foreboding joy. You really want to be happy but now you have something to lose. And, if you allow it, that fear will have a field day with all the ways things could crash and burn.

Having awareness of what may occur and why can be a really useful thing to combat these thoughts when they come up. As they say, knowledge is power. But if you’re also looking for ways to navigate these challenges, here's some of my suggestions:

·       Cultivate Self-Awareness: Take the time to check in with yourself regularly. Notice any fears, doubts, or limiting beliefs that arise and explore them with compassion and curiosity.

·       Practice Mindfulness: Stay present in the moment, allowing yourself to fully experience the emotions of your journey. Mindfulness can help you navigate uncertainty with greater ease and clarity.

·       Embrace Imperfection: Let go of the need to have it all figured out. Embrace the messiness of life, knowing that growth often happens in the spaces between our triumphs and failures.

·       Seek Support: Don’t be afraid to reach out for support when you need it. Whether it’s from friends, family, or a trusted counsellor, having a support network can make all the difference during times of transition.

Embrace the unexpected challenges that come with getting what you want and go forth with courage and an open heart, knowing that the best is yet to come.

If you're not sure on your true desires or what path to take forward, I have a series of soulful tasks to guide you in knowing what is the right thing to do. You can get this here.

Ellee is a qualified holistic counsellor accredited with IICT. She has a Bachelor in Complementary Medicine and is passionate about all things spiritual wellness.

Ellee Picken

Ellee is a qualified holistic counsellor accredited with IICT. She has a Bachelor in Complementary Medicine and is passionate about all things spiritual wellness.

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